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ASHLINA KAPOSTA

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10 Life Changing Cheat Codes I Learned This Year That I Wish Every Woman Knew {podcast ep.371}

ashlina kaposta December 29, 2025

10 Cheat Codes I Learned This Year That Changed My Life

This year didn’t change me in loud ways.

There were no overnight breakthroughs.
No dramatic reinventions.
No frantic hustle or chasing the next version of myself.

What changed me was integration.

The kind that happens quietly — when you stop trying to prove yourself and start trusting yourself. When you stop performing and start embodying. When you finally let your feminine wisdom lead… and allow your masculine energy to support it instead of override it.

In my 40s, I’ve learned that growth doesn’t come from doing more — it comes from living what you already know.

These aren’t hacks.
They aren’t shortcuts.
And they definitely aren’t hustle tactics.

These are life cheat codes that only reveal themselves once you’ve lived enough to recognize what actually matters.

They’re the result of slowing down instead of speeding up.
Listening to my body instead of pushing through it.
Choosing presence over pressure.
Consistency over chaos.
And decisiveness over doubt.

They’re the lessons that emerge when you stop trying to become someone else — and fully commit to being yourself.

As I looked back on this year — through photos, journals, conversations, content I created, and the patterns that kept repeating — I realized something:

I wasn’t just moving through another season of life.
I was becoming a more grounded, sovereign, embodied version of myself.

A woman who honors her capacity.
Who protects her peace.
Who leads with intuition but follows through with discipline.
Who understands that feminine energy doesn’t mean passivity — it means power with grace.

These are the 10 life cheat codes I learned this year that I wish every woman knew — not because they’ll make life perfect, but because they’ll make it more aligned, AND genuinely changed my life — my energy, my business, my nervous system, and the way I move through the world.

Listen to the podcast episode here:

1. Document Your Journey — Even When It Feels Ordinary

One of the most emotional moments I had this year was simply looking back.

Photos from my phone.
Little memories my iPhone surfaced.
A recap ChatGPT created for me.
Spotify Wrapped.

And suddenly I could see it — the growth I didn’t notice while living it.

When you’re in the middle of becoming, it can feel mundane. But documentation turns the ordinary into evidence.

I’ve learned that documenting your journey isn’t about proving anything to anyone else — it’s about witnessing yourself.

You don’t need a perfect plan.
You don’t need a big reveal.
You just need to let your life be seen — even by you.

Tip:
Document simply. Photos. Voice notes. Short journal entries. Content that says, “This is where I am right now.” One day, it will mean everything.

2. Protect Your Peace First — Everything Changes When You Do

This year, I stopped negotiating with my nervous system.

I realized how much energy I was leaking — to conversations that went nowhere, to situations I couldn’t control, to people who no longer aligned with who I was becoming.

Protecting your peace isn’t about being cold or closed off.
It’s about being intentional.

When you stop giving your energy to what drains you, life opens up. Your clarity sharpens. Your body softens. Your decisions get cleaner.

Peace is the foundation of everything meaningful I’ve built.

Tip:
If something leaves you dysregulated, exhausted, or anxious — pause before engaging. Peace is data. Listen to it.

3. Romanticize the Everyday — Your Energy Depends on It

I noticed how much my mood improved when I slowed down enough to notice my life.

The smell of coffee.
Morning light.
Lighting a candle for no reason.
Dressing like the woman I’m becoming, not the woman who’s “just staying home.”

Romanticizing your life isn’t about pretending everything is perfect.
It’s about bringing presence to what already exists.

When you treat your daily life with care, your nervous system responds with safety — and from safety, everything flows better.

Tip:
Choose one daily ritual and treat it like it matters. Your body is always listening.

4. Honor Your Capacity — You Don’t Have to Earn Rest

This year taught me the difference between growth and self-betrayal.

There were moments where pushing would’ve looked impressive — but resting was actually wiser.

Honoring your capacity means knowing when you’ve done enough.
It means choosing rest without guilt.
It means trusting your body’s intelligence.

Burnout doesn’t build legacy.
Sustainability does.

Tip:
Ask yourself daily: “What would support me right now?” Then let that be enough.

5. Do Less — But With More Intention

I stopped trying to do everything.

Instead, I started asking better questions:

  • What is this teaching me?

  • What’s the deeper message here?

  • What actually matters?

When you slow down, the lesson reveals itself.

Depth creates impact.
Intention creates clarity.
And clarity saves time.

Tip:
Before starting something new, ask: “What’s the purpose of this?” If it’s unclear, pause.

6. Stay Consistent — Especially When It’s Boring

This year reminded me that consistency isn’t about motivation — it’s about identity.

Anyone can show up when something feels new, exciting, or results-driven. But the real transformation happens when you keep going after the novelty wears off.

Consistency is how trust is built — with your body, your mind, your work, and yourself.

At the gym, it’s not about doing an extreme program for 30 days.
It’s about moving your body in a way you can sustain for years.

With food, it’s not about dieting.
It’s about choosing nourishment as a lifestyle — something that supports your energy, hormones, and nervous system long-term.

With content and business, it’s not about posting obsessively for a week and disappearing for a month.
It’s about showing up regularly, calmly, and with intention — even when no one is applauding.

Boring doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong.
Boring often means you’ve created safety — and safety is where things compound.

Consistency turns effort into ease.
It’s how habits become identity.
And identity is what creates lasting change.

Tip:
Choose rhythms you can maintain on your worst days, not your best ones. Sustainable consistency beats intensity every time.

7. Learn to Let Go Quickly — This Is Emotional Freedom

One of the most powerful lessons I learned this year was how much lighter life becomes when you stop holding onto what’s already trying to leave.

Detachment isn’t about not caring.
It’s about caring without clinging.

It’s learning how to block out the noise — opinions, expectations, timelines, pressure — and listen to what actually feels true for you.

This year, I got comfortable cutting things off.
Conversations.
Habits.
Old versions of myself.
Even identities I had outgrown.

Not out of anger — but out of clarity.

Detachment taught me how to surrender without collapsing. How to release without spiraling. How to trust that what’s meant for me doesn’t require force, fixation, or fear.

When you stop gripping so tightly, your nervous system relaxes.
And when your nervous system feels safe, intuition gets louder.

Detachment creates space — and space is where the next chapter arrives.

Tip:
When something feels heavy, ask yourself: “Am I holding this out of fear, or out of alignment?” If it’s fear, it’s time to loosen your grip.

8. Start Before You Feel Ready — Confidence Follows Action

One of the most freeing realizations I had this year was that waiting to feel “ready” was never going to get me where I wanted to go.

Readiness is a mental construct.
Confidence is a byproduct of movement.

So many of us believe we need more clarity, more certainty, or more proof before we take the next step — but clarity doesn’t arrive through thinking. It arrives through doing.

This year, I stopped waiting to feel prepared and started acting from alignment instead.

I showed up before I felt confident.
I shared ideas before they felt fully formed.
I made moves before I had all the answers.

And every time I did, something clicked.

Action creates feedback.
Feedback creates refinement.
Refinement creates confidence.

You don’t become brave and then act.
You act — and bravery meets you there.

When you start before you feel ready, you teach your nervous system that expansion is safe. You stop outsourcing your power to fear and start building self-trust through experience.

Momentum doesn’t require perfection.
It requires permission — and you can give that to yourself.

Tip:
If you’re waiting for clarity, take the smallest aligned action instead. Movement will show you what thinking never will.

9. Become a Decisive Woman — This Is Where Your Power Locks In

This year showed me just how much energy is wasted in indecision.

Overthinking.
Second-guessing.
Keeping backup plans “just in case.”
Holding ten possibilities open at once.

Indecision feels responsible — but it’s actually exhausting.

One of the most powerful shifts I made was learning how to decide.

The root of the word decisive literally means to cut off.
When you decide something, you cut off every other option.

You stop entertaining alternatives.
You stop wavering.
You stop leaking energy into doubt.

This is what it means to step into queen energy.

A queen doesn’t test a hundred paths.
She chooses one — and builds it.

For example:
When I decide that my blog is becoming one of the top blogs in the country, with 100,000+ monthly page views, that decision collapses time. There is no “if.” There is no “maybe.” There is no backup identity.

There is only alignment, action, and follow-through.

And this is how manifestation actually works.

Decisions create direction.
Direction creates momentum.
Momentum creates reality.

Decisive women conserve energy because they’re no longer scattered. They’re not chasing trends, questioning every move, or reacting emotionally to temporary setbacks.

They show up.
They take action.
They adjust — without abandoning the vision.

They don’t sit in doubt.
They don’t wait for reassurance.
They become the version of themselves who already decided.

Decision Hack:
Ask yourself, “If I fully trusted myself, what would I choose right now?”
Then choose it — and stop revisiting the decision.

Your power sharpens the moment you decide.

10. Build a Life You Love — Then Take It Online With You

This may be the most important thing I learned this year.

You don’t build a meaningful online business by chasing what everyone else likes, follows, or approves of. You build it by getting radically honest about what you love.

What you’re drawn to.
What you can talk about for hours.
What lights you up.
What you’ve lived, survived, softened into, and learned from.

Your life is your brand — not in a performative way, but in a truthful way.

The way you see the world.
The experiences that shaped you.
The wisdom you’ve earned.
The things that make you feel most alive.

That’s the work.

I created my dream lifestyle because I stopped trying to build what was trendy and started building what was true for me.

I curated a life I actually enjoy living.
I paid attention to what I loved.
I honored my natural rhythms, interests, and seasons.

And then — I shared it.

Not perfectly.
Not loudly.
But consistently, honestly, and with heart.

When you share you — your perspective, your lessons, your aliveness — it creates resonance. And resonance creates impact.

Your uniqueness isn’t random.
It’s relational.

It moves people.
It gives permission.
It changes lives in quiet, meaningful ways.

And here’s the part that still amazes me:

We live in a time where you can be divinely compensated for this.

You can get paid to live, reflect, curate, teach, and share.
You can build income from the things that genuinely matter to you.
You can create a life that feels rich — emotionally, spiritually, creatively, and financially.

Your best year doesn’t come from becoming someone else.
It comes from becoming more of yourself — and letting the world meet you there.

This is the philosophy behind everything I teach inside Shine Online — how to turn your life, your voice, and your vision into something meaningful and sustainable online.

Not by forcing.
Not by copying.
But by building what you love — and letting it support you in return.

Your Best Year Yet Is Up To You

Life doesn’t change all at once.

It changes quietly — choice by choice, moment by moment.

And when your lifestyle, values, and work align, life stops feeling like resistance… and starts feeling like flow.

This philosophy is the foundation of everything I teach inside Shine Online: Digital Wealth Mastermind— how to turn your life, your message, and your creativity into something meaningful and sustainable online.

Not overnight.
But intentionally.
And beautifully.

You may also like:

💛 The 12 Best books on Manifestation that transformed my life

💛 The 8 phases of Manifestation you need to know.

💛 11 simple ways to regulate your nervous system

💛 How to boost your oxytocin to manifest more

Download my FREE Manifestation Mindset Makeover workbook here.

Please feel free to email me at ashlina@thedecorista.com if you have any questions!  I’m always happy to help with decorating, life advice or even picking out a specific perfume!  Have an amazing day!!

Also, check out my Amazon shop HERE to shop all my favorite things, tips and tricks. You can also download the free LIKETOKNOW.IT app and follow me HERE.

STAY IN THE KNOW:  Don’t forget to sign up for my exclusive Love Letters for STYLE TIPS, LIFE ADVICE, COSMIC TEA, AND MUCH MORE!

As always, thank you so much for stopping by today, I truly appreciate all of you! xo, Ashlina

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ASHLINA KAPOSTA

… A creative, work from home, mom-entrepreneur who is passionate about all things blissful. Here you’ll find musings on decorating, slow living, self-development, manifestation, femininity, mindset, wellness, business, organization and lifestyle!

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