Do You Carry Too Much Masculine Energy After 40? 7 Signs to Watch For

ashlina kaposta September 14, 2025

As women, we often spend our 20s and 30s proving ourselves—climbing the career ladder, juggling family responsibilities, holding everything together. But once we reach our 40s, something shifts.

We begin craving more ease, softness, and balance. Yet many of us are still living in survival mode, operating from a place of masculine energy: hustle, overdoing, and pushing forward at all costs.

Masculine energy itself isn’t bad—it’s focused, productive, and protective. But when it becomes dominant, it can leave us feeling burned out, disconnected from our feminine energy, and even resentful in relationships. If you’ve been wondering why you feel exhausted, uninspired, or like you’re carrying the world on your shoulders, this might be your wake-up call.

Here’s everything you need to know about masculine energy, how it shows up in healthy vs. unhealthy ways, and the 7 signs you may be carrying too much of it after 40.

What Is Masculine Energy?

Masculine energy is the archetypal energy of doing, structure, logic, and protection. It’s the part of us that takes action, provides, solves problems, and creates direction.

It’s important to note: masculine energy has nothing to do with gender—it’s a universal energy we all carry, regardless of whether we’re men or women. Ideally, we balance both masculine (doing, structure) and feminine (being, flow) energies in our daily lives.

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Masculine Energy

Healthy Masculine Energy looks like:

Creating structure and stability in your life
Using logic to make clear decisions
Setting goals and following through with action
Providing safety and protection (for yourself and others)
Honoring boundaries with strength and respect

Unhealthy Masculine Energy looks like:

Overworking and constant “hustle” mentality
Controlling everything and everyone around you
Relying only on logic while ignoring intuition
Being overly rigid and unwilling to adapt
Struggling to rest, relax, or receive support

When healthy, masculine energy helps us thrive. But when it becomes unbalanced or dominant, it can block creativity, intimacy, and joy.

Why Balancing Masculine and Feminine Energy Matters After 40

By the time we hit our 40s, many women realize they’ve been running on masculine energy for decades—especially if they’ve been managing careers, raising families, or always being “the strong one.” While that strength has helped you succeed, staying in overdrive can cause burnout, resentment, and even health issues.

Balancing masculine and feminine energy allows you to:

Reduce stress and burnout – You stop living in constant “fight or flight.”
Improve relationships – You attract more harmony, intimacy, and deeper connection.
Enhance your health – Rest, pleasure, and receptivity support hormonal balance and vitality.
Reignite creativity and joy – Feminine flow brings inspiration and passion back into daily life.
Feel supported, not depleted – Instead of doing it all alone, you allow space for help, ease, and abundance.

Balance doesn’t mean abandoning your masculine energy—it means using it wisely while reconnecting with your feminine essence.

Related Reading: 12 must read books on feminine energy

7 Signs You’re Carrying Too Much Masculine Energy After 40

1. You Overwork and Struggle to Rest

Do you feel guilty when you’re not doing something “productive”? Overworking is one of the clearest signs of being stuck in masculine energy. You’re always striving for the next achievement, the next task, the next thing to check off the list. After 40, your body is craving rest and restoration more than ever, but masculine energy can trick you into believing rest equals laziness.

2. You’re Always the “Strong One” for Everyone Else

If you’re the one friends, family, and coworkers lean on, you may be carrying an unconscious badge of honor for being “the strong one.” While it feels empowering, it often masks exhaustion. Constantly holding it all together can disconnect you from your vulnerability, softness, and receptivity—the qualities that actually allow you to be supported.

3. People-Pleasing Has Become Your Default

Masculine energy in overdrive can make you feel responsible for everyone else’s happiness. If you’re constantly saying yes when you mean no, or managing other people’s emotions so they’re not upset, you’re carrying too much weight. People-pleasing is often rooted in fear of rejection—but it only depletes your feminine energy and leaves you resentful.

4. You Prioritize Logic Over Intuition

Masculine energy thrives on strategy, reason, and control. Feminine energy thrives on intuition, flow, and trust. If you find yourself second-guessing your gut instincts or dismissing them in favor of “rational” choices, you may be overly in your masculine. After 40, connecting to your intuition isn’t just spiritual—it’s a survival tool for living in alignment with your body and desires.

5. You Struggle to Receive Help or Support

Do you pride yourself on being independent to a fault? While independence is powerful, it can also block intimacy and connection. If you find it hard to accept help—even when you desperately need it—you’re likely in your masculine. The feminine thrives when she allows herself to receive, whether it’s love, support, compliments, or care.

6. You’re Constantly in “Fix It” Mode

Notice yourself always looking for solutions, jumping in to fix problems before anyone even asks? That’s masculine energy running the show. The feminine doesn’t need to fix—it holds space, nurtures, and allows things to unfold. Constantly trying to manage or repair everything leaves no room for softness or surrender.

7. You Feel Disconnected from Joy and Pleasure

When life is all work, responsibilities, and productivity, it’s easy to forget what lights you up. If joy, creativity, or pleasure feel like “extras” you don’t have time for, that’s a red flag. The feminine thrives in play, beauty, and pleasure. Without it, you can feel dry, robotic, and uninspired.

How to Rebalance Masculine and Feminine Energy After 40

Awareness is the first step, but small shifts in your daily life can help restore balance and reconnect you with your feminine energy. Here are a few practices to begin:

Rest without guilt – Block out intentional downtime, even if it’s just 20 minutes, and remind yourself that rest is productive.
Practice receiving – Allow someone to help you, accept compliments without deflection, or say yes when support is offered.
Reignite your intuition – Journal daily, pull an oracle card, or simply pause to ask yourself, “What do I feel drawn toward?” before making decisions.
Incorporate pleasure rituals – Light candles during dinner, buy yourself flowers, dance in your living room—bring more beauty and play into everyday moments.
Say no with love – Setting boundaries isn’t rejection—it’s self-respect. Practice saying no so you have more energy for what matters most.

A Deeper Dive Into Balancing Your Energy

These practices are just the beginning. Truly shifting out of survival mode and into your radiant feminine essence requires a full reset—one that helps you release old conditioning and create rituals that keep you in balance every day.

This is exactly what I guide women through inside my Goddess Glow Up course. In this program, you’ll learn how to:

Recognize when you’re slipping into unhealthy masculine patterns.
Build nourishing rituals that support your hormones, energy, and glow after 40.
Reconnect with your sacred feminine essence so you stop over-giving and start receiving.
Create balance between being productive and being magnetic, so your life flows with ease.

7 Healthy Masculine Energy Daily Habits

1. Set Clear Intentions & Goals

Each morning, write down your top 3 priorities for the day. This isn’t about overloading yourself with tasks — it’s about creating focus and direction so you feel purposeful and steady.

2. Time-Blocking for Structure

Use blocks of time for different categories: work, movement, rest, connection. This helps prevent overwhelm and gives your mind the stability it craves. Masculine energy thrives in structure.

3. Take Decisive Action

Instead of lingering in indecision, commit to making clear choices. Healthy masculine energy is about progress — even small, imperfect steps forward keep you from getting stuck in overthinking.

4. Honor Boundaries

Say “no” when something doesn’t align with your energy. Protecting your time and space is an act of strength that supports both your masculine and feminine balance.

5. Daily Movement Discipline

Even if it’s just 20 minutes, choose one consistent form of physical activity — walking, lifting weights, yoga, cycling. This daily discipline keeps your body strong and anchored.

6. Financial Mindfulness

Masculine energy is tied to protection and provision. Check in with your finances daily: review spending, track income, or set aside money for savings. This habit keeps you grounded in security.

7. Reflect & Recalibrate

At the end of the day, take a moment to look back: What worked? What didn’t? What’s the next step? This self-leadership creates growth and keeps your energy intentional instead of reactive.

Why Healthy Masculine Habits Matter

When practiced with balance, these habits help you:

Feel grounded and confident
Prevent burnout by creating structure
Build consistency (which the feminine can then flow within)
Strengthen self-trust and leadership in your life

Masculine energy doesn’t have to feel harsh or rigid. In its healthy form, it’s the container that allows your feminine energy to feel safe, supported, and free to shine.

If this post resonates with you, the course will give you the deeper tools and daily practices to truly transform how you show up in your body, your relationships, and your life.

Parting Thoughts

Recognizing these signs isn’t about blaming yourself—it’s about creating awareness and choosing differently. If you see yourself in these patterns, it’s an invitation to soften, surrender, and allow your feminine essence to shine.

After 40, your energy becomes more precious than ever. By balancing your masculine and feminine energy, you create space for deeper love, more joy, and the radiant glow that comes from living in harmony with yourself.

✨ And if you’re ready to take this work further, I’d love to support you inside Goddess Glow Up—your guide to resetting your energy, reclaiming your radiance, and embodying your most magnetic feminine self.

Emotional Intelligence: 5 Good Girl Habits That Block Your Manifestations + how to break them {podcast ep. 357}

ashlina kaposta August 26, 2025

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything “right” when it comes to manifestation — scripting, visualizing, keeping your vibe high — but you’re still not seeing results, you’re not alone. The truth is, many women are unknowingly sabotaging their manifestation power with “good girl trauma habits.”

These are the unconscious behaviors we learned to keep the peace, stay likable, and fit into roles that made others comfortable. But while they may have once felt safe, they now energetically block your alignment, weaken your boundaries, and send mixed signals to the Universe.

Listen to the podcast episode here:

If you’re ready to stop shrinking into the ‘good girl’ and finally step into the magnetic woman you were always meant to be, Manifestation Queen Academy will walk you through the exact tools, rituals, and mindset shifts to manifest with confidence, clarity, and ease.

In this post, we’ll explore not only the 5 most common good girl trauma habits, but also the deeper issues of spiritual bypassing, the missing link of emotional intelligence, and a step-by-step framework to manifest in a grounded, powerful, and authentic way.

What Is Spiritual Bypassing (and Why It’s Hurting You)?

Spiritual bypassing happens when we use spiritual practices or beliefs to avoid facing real emotions. Think:

Forcing positivity when you’re struggling.
Pretending everything is fine so you don’t “lower your vibration.”
Repeating affirmations without processing the anger, grief, or fear underneath.

👉 The problem? This creates a fragile foundation. When challenges come, everything crumbles because you’ve never learned how to regulate your emotions and move through them.

💡 Takeaway: Manifestation isn’t about avoiding negative emotions — it’s about processing them fully so you can realign with your desires in truth and authenticity.

The 5 Good Girl Trauma Habits Blocking Your Manifestations

These habits might look harmless on the surface, but energetically, they’re keeping you from becoming magnetic. Here’s what they are — and how to shift them.

Habit 1: Saying “I’m Fine” When You’re Not

When you automatically say “I’m fine” even though you’re hurting, overwhelmed, or angry, you create an energetic mismatch between your inner world and your outer words. Manifestation requires congruence — your vibration, words, and actions need to align.

Why it blocks manifestation: The Universe can’t deliver clarity when you’re masking the truth. Pretending to be okay keeps you from receiving the support or healing you need.
What to do instead: Practice radical honesty with yourself first. Try journaling prompts like, “What am I really feeling right now?” or say out loud, “I’m not okay today, and that’s okay.”
Motivational shift: Remember — your vulnerability is not weakness. It’s strength. By acknowledging your real feelings, you open the door to authentic transformation.

Habit 2: Avoiding What You Really Want

Many women hold back from naming their desires because they fear being “selfish,” “too much,” or “unrealistic.” But manifestation only works when you’re brave enough to own what you truly want.

Why it blocks manifestation: Shrinking your desires signals lack to the Universe. If you won’t admit what you want, you’ll never energetically align with it.
What to do instead: Write a “no limits” list. Ask yourself, “If I believed I was worthy of it all, what would I claim?” Say it, script it, and feel into it unapologetically.
Motivational shift: Claiming your desires is an act of self-worth. When you own what you want, you show the Universe you’re ready to receive.

Habit 3: Over-Explaining and Justifying Your Decisions

Do you find yourself explaining every choice — why you left a job, why you’re dating someone, why you bought something — as if you need everyone else’s permission?

Why it blocks manifestation: Over-explaining leaks your power and tells the Universe you don’t fully trust yourself. Manifestation thrives on self-certainty.
What to do instead: Try setting a boundary: “This feels right for me, and that’s enough.” No justification required.
Motivational shift: Every time you stand in your decision with confidence, you magnetize more opportunities aligned with your authentic self.

Habit 4: Fake Chill Girl Energy (Avoiding Conflict)

Being “low maintenance” or the “chill girl” might feel easier in the moment, but in reality, you’re bypassing conflict and suppressing emotions that need to be expressed.

Why it blocks manifestation: Suppressing tension dysregulates your nervous system. Instead of being calm, you’re in silent overdrive — and the Universe feels that frantic energy.
What to do instead: Before a tough conversation, regulate your energy with breathwork, meditation, or a grounding ritual. Then, show up and speak your truth clearly and calmly.
Motivational shift: Real magnetism doesn’t come from being easygoing at all costs — it comes from being regulated, authentic, and unafraid of honesty.

Habit 5: Apologizing When You Don’t Need To

Constantly saying “sorry” — for taking up space, asking questions, or simply existing — creates an energetic pattern of guilt.

Why it blocks manifestation: Apologizing unnecessarily signals unworthiness. If you’re always sorry, you unconsciously affirm you don’t deserve to receive.
What to do instead: Replace “sorry” with “thank you.” Instead of “sorry I’m late,” say “thank you for waiting.”
Motivational shift: Every unnecessary apology you stop giving is a step back into your power. You are worthy of space, respect, and your desires.

The Missing Piece: Emotional Intelligence

Manifestation isn’t about staying “high vibe” — it’s about becoming emotionally resilient. That resilience comes from emotional intelligence, which is the ability to notice, process, and regulate emotions while also respecting others’.

The 4 Core Skills to Build Emotional Intelligence:

Self-Awareness: Notice your triggers, patterns, and feelings without judgment.
- Practice: Ask yourself daily, “What am I feeling and why?”
Self-Regulation: Learn to calm your nervous system and process emotions healthily.
- Practice: Breathwork, EFT tapping, somatic movement.
Empathy: Understand how others may feel, even in conflict.
- Practice: Pause before reacting and consider their perspective.
Boundaries: Communicate needs clearly without guilt.
- Practice: Use “I” statements like, “I feel ___ when ___ happens. I need ___.”

💡 Takeaway: The more emotionally intelligent you are, the more grounded and magnetic your manifestation energy becomes.

Manifestation doesn’t happen by bypassing your emotions — it happens when you align with them. If you’re craving deeper support in building emotional intelligence and stepping into your glow, join me inside Manifestation Queen Academy. It’s your invitation to stop playing small and start manifesting the life you deserve.

How to Manifest Without Bypassing

Instead of spiritual bypassing or “good girl” habits, try this grounded framework:

Step 1: Acknowledge Reality
Say what’s real. Example: “I’m anxious about money right now.”

Step 2: Process Emotions
Journal, cry, or move your body. Let the energy move through you.

Step 3: Choose Intentional Action
Act from your higher self, not your triggered self. Example: Instead of panic-spending, make one clear financial plan.

Step 4: Hold the Vision
Now return to your affirmations, scripting, and visualization — but from an emotionally integrated state.

💡 Takeaway: Your desires become more magnetic when you align with them from truth and grounded wholeness, not avoidance.

From Good Girl to Glow Girl

Breaking free from good girl habits isn’t just about boundaries — it’s about claiming your worth, your power, and your authenticity. When you stop apologizing, stop faking “fine,” and stop bypassing your emotions, you create space for true magnetism.

The Universe doesn’t need you to be perfect. It needs you to be authentic. And that authenticity, combined with emotional intelligence, is the most powerful manifestation tool you’ll ever have.

Beautiful, you don’t have to keep apologizing, bypassing, or waiting for permission. Your next level begins the moment you choose yourself. Inside Manifestation Queen, I’ll teach you how to regulate your energy, reclaim your self-worth, and manifest from your most authentic, feminine power.

ASHLINA KAPOSTA

… A creative, work from home, mom-entrepreneur who is passionate about all things blissful. Here you’ll find musings on decorating, slow living, self-development, spirituality, femininity, mindset, health, astrology, wellness, business, organization and lifestyle!

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